I am so confused.

Is a birth control decision mutual or independent? I(24f) have been dating my (26m) partner for a couple of months now and I have an iud (birth control). Lately,  it has been giving me pain, so my doctor suggested I take it out, and not have it for some time. 

 

My partner and I have been getting into arguments over it because he likes to cum in me, but I don’t like it because even though I have birth control, we could still maybe get pregnant. 

He just had a kid with his fwb a year ago, and he is worried we are going to get pregnant because we have sex a lot ,so he wants me to keep my birth control, and I want to take it out.

My question is should I take his suggestions in mind?

 

Hello,

Each couple should be able to mutually decide if they want to conceive, when and how often. The decision however stops being joint when there are health risks involved. Discussing which birth control to use OR when to stop using one, for a woman, is a topic to be addressed by her and her physician only.   

DR’S ORDERS

Your pain, discomfort and  Dr.’s advice should have priority over your boyfriend’s feelings. He does not get to override someone’s pain and a professional’s judgment to accommodate his needs. If your Dr. advised you to remove the birth control, then that is exactly what you should do. Why would you pay a professional and not listen to their advice? Don’t forget pain is your body’s way of warning you. It should never be ignored. Especially for someone else’s pleasure. Nope. Not happening.

PTSD

 His past mistakes should not be a reason for him to ignore your feelings. Instead, they should be a cautionary tale of what happens when we are reckless. If he does not want to have more children, he should be more careful. He cannot engage in activities that put him at risk, and expect others to pay the price for his choices. Also, you have made it crystal clear even with birth control,there is a chance you two can conceive. Should it happen, he has no one to blame but himself, because he has been warned. 

COME NEXT

Please listen to your physician’s advice, and have the birth control removed from your body. Use condoms in the meantime, and follow the instructions of the professional who is practicing trained judgment, and do not heed to your boyfriend’s selfish needs. This is your body, and your pain comes first, your boyfriend’s need to come follows next.